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Demi Moore chatted with David Letterman last night to promote her new movie Flawless. Dave commented on her “amazing” looks and Demi revealed her latest age-defying secrete: Austrian leech therapy. These pics are from this morning so judger for yourself whether she looks amazing or, I dunno, let’s say an alien. Here’s an excerpt of the interview via The Huffington Post:

“I feel like I’ve always been someone looking for the cutting edge of things that optimize your health and healing,” she told Dave. “I was in Austria doing a cleanse and part of the treatment was leech therapy.”
Demi describes how four leeches got drunk on her blood, starting from her bellybutton, and how they don’t like hair and prefer waxed or shaved skin.

Hopefully Demi Moore will continue her leech therapy at home and maybe, fingers crossed, one of them will escape and bite off Ashton Kutcher’s penis. Then, as the story goes, an angel gets its wings and becomes a stripper. I’m 90% sure that’s in the Bible. Right after the chapter where God tells Moses that “Dude, if you think you’re cool to drive, I believe you. But first we should totally get nachos!”

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Ashton Kutcher’s new show Pop Fiction has “celebrities” pulling pranks on the media. Paris Hilton pretended to be spiritual with a monk and Avril Lavigne wore a fake belly. However tabloid editors aren′t buying it and see right through the shenanigans of this assclownius supremus. Here’s some quotes from NY Daily News:

“There’s nothing these people do that we don’t know about before they get there. We know everything. Ninety percent of their lives are put together by other people. It’s almost like these celebs have LoJack. It’s easy to track them. “
Star mag ran a picture of Paris and her “guru,” but reported that it was a stunt. “We never took it seriously,” Star editor in chief Candace Trunzo tells us. “After a while, you learn what smells.” Kutcher’s crusade for truth won′t affect Star’s coverage of Kutcher and his wife, Demi Moore, Trunzo says. “He’s only semi-interesting,” she says. “He doesn′t sell a lot of mags.”
“It’s a typical conceited celebrity,” says a mag insider. “Live a life, man. Grow up. Go act. If a celeb has a full week, then they have way too much time on their hands.”

“Go act.” Ashton Kutcher - acting! LMFAO! That’s goddamn hilarious. Seriously, how do you follow that? My hat’s off to you, sir. *dead rabbit falls out* Captain Wigglenose?

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Even more important, much appreciated by all the *wood gold/plats. …

Landing on the ground Vincent raced into the woods hoping to escape the cold hard world his kind lived in…