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jennandjon posted a photo:

jennandjon posted a photo:

Richie Sambora was arrested for DUI and is now staring down the barrel of charges for child endangerment since he brilliantly decided to drive drunk with his 10-year-old daughter Ava in the car. Also in the car was another minor and an unidentified woman. Scope out Heather Locklear’s response when notified of the arrest, according to TMZ:

And, police sources say, after Sambora was busted, the cops called Heather Locklear, Ava’s mom. We’re told Heather authorized the woman in the car to drive her daughter home.

Okay, your ex-husband just get picked up driving drunk with your daughter in the car. Most mothers would’ve rushed to the scene and picked up their child. Heather Locker says, “Eh, just let some chick drive her home.” Damn, she’s hot and lazy. It’s almost like we were made for each other. Heather, will you marry me? I promise not to leave you for Denise Richards. Unless I could somehow pull it off without leaving the couch….

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The Sun posted these pics of Ashlee Simpson wearing a bikini in Jamaica while vacationing with Pete Wentz. I can’t tell if she’s rocking some implants but, if she is, they were probably installed at birth and confirm my long held theory about Joe Simpson: He loves America - a lot. I’m talking he wants to make love to the USA and not just “have sex.” Then they’d spoon on the couch and watch Atonement. Until Joe brings up getting implants again and they start arguing. He just wants you to look beautiful, America. But mostly in the Dakota region.

EDIT: Had to take down the images. Hit the link above to check them out.

So yesterday I posted smoking bikini pics of Simona Fusco Stratten in Hawaii. I heard your cries declaring Kim Kardashian is way hotter. So here’s Kim shopping at Rite Aid. I′ll let you guys battle it out over who’s better looking. Which do I prefer? Please, real women are for chumps. I moved on to fictional chicks a long time ago. Yo, Ariel, get your seashells on we got a reservation to make. And quit hitting that Snarfblatt with Sebastian. I don’t want you causing another scene at the salad bar. I almost went back to Xena that’s how embarrassed I was. Yeah, okay, she ended up being a lesbian but at least I could take her nice places. But mostly she wanted to go to Hooters. *sniff* God, I miss her…

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